I went to discuss the fertility issue today with a chap in Brighton. Right deep breath, Chemo does not destroy the chance of having children entirely in most people, but it reduces it and sometimes significantly so there is still a chance my fertility will return but I am left without choice but to be having children later than I wanted so mid to late 30's if everything works out. If I dont have chemo radiotherapy does not alter fertility but I am still not advised to have kids for at least two years. The scariest piece of news today was it is so risky for someone with cancer to be pregnant because pregnancy hormones accelerate cancer growth and if I was able to fall pregnant in the next two years the only real option is abortion. So if that is not going to terrify you from ever having sex I don't know what will! I am pretty damn annoyed no one told me sooner because such important information should be top of the list in my head. People with cancer do not need any extra stress and abortion etc and the risk is a situation that can be prevented from occurring if people knew. So if you take anything from this blog take that piece of information and get it out there.
As for me I could take fertility drugs during chemo to keep my ovaries possibly working but the drugs reduce the chemo's impact on the tissue and raise the risk of it not working so hmm no doubt here that option is not worth it. I have to return in a year to the specialist and get tests to see what my chances are.
No freezing eggs because they use female hormones to induce your cycle to retrieve the eggs and hormones as I said make cancer grow, it is not very successful anyway.
But here is the shocker no IVF treatment after because they won't fund it for me as Phil has two kids already oh unless I have thousands upon thousands of pounds I want to spend with no guarantee it will work especially in my situation. I found that part the most hard to swallow, surely discrimination springs to mind here. I have enough tolerance, strength and love to go through the highs and lows, the strain and hardship of taking on someone else's children, because no matter how much I love them dearly it has been a rough road indeed with a high personal cost, and I am now told I don't have the same right as another unattached woman in my position. I will support the NHS in many many ways but this I abhor and it has left me stunned.
The real harsh part is that they break this to you 11 flights of stairs up (lifts were full of push chairs) in the ante natal clinic. I just think it's incredibly insensitive.
But there is no point thinking about this for the next year because it won't change the future or even influence it so deep breath and let this go for now. I only wish it was so simple.
I am sure I will be more chipper tomorrow just a tough couple of days taking its toll right now.
xxx Love Love Love
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