Welcome to the c word
I rarely show the world what is going on inside it is just not my style. I hide pain and constantly worry about worrying other people and how they will feel about how I am feeling. I keep my problems to myself and sometimes even from my closest friends. Well not this time.
I have been on the c word roller-coaster (I'm calling it the c word to go easy on the faint hearted) for over three weeks now and have decided it is a good idea to write down what's happened, happening and going to happen then whoever wants to keep up to date can without being forced to hear about it through emails from me. Because you will all have days where you just can't or don't want to hear about this. I get that it’s ok.
I hope not but you also might meet people or know people who go through something similar and it might just help them in some way to know they are not alone and when they fall apart it is ok because who wouldn’t. When you read this please forgive grammar and spelling etc I have not slept for three days and sorry too if it is up and down that is pretty much how I am doing most days.
- Tuesday 23rd February 2010
Tuesday, 16 March 2010
Didn't you know I have brothers? Yep two older brothers middle bro Paul, he and I were especially close when we were teenagers rebelling against whatever was out there to rebel against, and sharing secrets, ups and downs. A few years ago he came to the park when I cried with a broken heart and brought strawberries, wisdom, hugs and time. Oldest bro Ian who listened recently in London said all the right things in a different park when I cried with a broken spirit and brought many of the same healing ingredients minus the strawberries but replaced them with a yummy lunch after. Needless to say I am luckiest girl alive in some ways because my family love me so much and it's returned ten fold, of course.