Welcome to the c word

I rarely show the world what is going on inside it is just not my style. I hide pain and constantly worry about worrying other people and how they will feel about how I am feeling. I keep my problems to myself and sometimes even from my closest friends. Well not this time.

I have been on the c word roller-coaster (I'm calling it the c word to go easy on the faint hearted) for over three weeks now and have decided it is a good idea to write down what's happened, happening and going to happen then whoever wants to keep up to date can without being forced to hear about it through emails from me. Because you will all have days where you just can't or don't want to hear about this. I get that it’s ok.

I hope not but you also might meet people or know people who go through something similar and it might just help them in some way to know they are not alone and when they fall apart it is ok because who wouldn’t. When you read this please forgive grammar and spelling etc I have not slept for three days and sorry too if it is up and down that is pretty much how I am doing most days.

- Tuesday 23rd February 2010

Wednesday 14 April 2010

yesterday now a distant memory or is it just the drugs

Well I am so glad yesterday is far far away and never coming back. Today started painfully but is now filled with lovely drugs that make me feel like I could run a marathon tonight. NO pain no worries. My dad came for most of the day bringing sandwiches without any filling and crackers! BLess him. He was lots of fun. Then my bro came which was lovely as always. Then Phil brought most of m & s. Sorry I am a touch out of it got a pharmacy in my blood stream. Anyway just checking in to say I am doing well. I think. X x
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